1. Rise with the sun to pray. Pray alone. Pray often. The Great Spirit will listen, if you only speak.
2. Be tolerant of those who are lost on their path. Ignorance, conceit, anger, jealousy – and greed stem from a lost soul. Pray that they will find guidance.
3. Search for yourself, by yourself. Do not allow others to make your path for you. It is your road, and yours alone. Others may walk it with you, but no one can walk it for you.
4. Treat the guests in your home with much consideration. Serve them the best food, give them the best bed and treat them with respect and honor.
5. Do not take what is not yours whether from a person, a community, the wilderness or from a culture. It was not earned nor given. It is not yours.
6. Respect all things that are placed upon this earth – whether it be people or plant.
7. Honor other people’s thoughts, wishes and words. Never interrupt another or mock or rudely mimic them. Allow each person the right to personal expression.
8. Never speak of others in a bad way. The negative energy that you put out into the universe will multiply when it returns to you.
9. All persons make mistakes. And all mistakes can be forgiven.
10. Bad thoughts cause illness of the mind, body and spirit. Practice optimism.
11. Nature is not FOR us, it is a PART of us. They are part of your worldly family.
12. Children are the seeds of our future. Plant love in their hearts and water them with wisdom and life’s lessons. When they are grown, give them space to grow.
13. Avoid hurting the hearts of others. The poison of your pain will return to you.
14. Be truthful at all times. Honesty is the test of ones will within this universe.
15. Keep yourself balanced. Your Mental self, Spiritual self, Emotional self, and Physical self – all need to be strong, pure and healthy. Work out the body to strengthen the mind. Grow rich in spirit to cure emotional ails.
16. Make conscious decisions as to who you will be and how you will react. Be responsible for your own actions.
17. Respect the privacy and personal space of others. Do not touch the personal property of others – especially sacred and religious objects. This is forbidden.
18. Be true to yourself first. You cannot nurture and help others if you cannot nurture and help yourself first.
19. Respect others religious beliefs. Do not force your belief on others.
When I coached young baseball players preparing to bat I encouraged them by advising them that they are powerful. They have the ‘bat’. The bat was the instrument to ‘make a difference’. In the game of baseball it was their opportunity to advance the cause of their team.
In the ‘Batter’s Box of Life’ we also have a bat. It’s our Voice, more importantly our ‘Actions’. What we Say and Do matter. The Values we honor and model matter. They matter especially to our children.
What Values are the Capitol Building rioters, their enablers and supporters, and those promoting dangerous untruthful conspiracy theories teaching their children? Will their children grow up to respect nation and life-supporting Values of social equality, justice and democracy?
When one of my ballplayers struck out I would counsel them to learn from their experience and that there would be a ‘next time’. I also led the teammates to share encouragement for the ‘next time’. When one of our batters got a hit it lifted the hopes and expectations of all.
The recent US national election has been a ‘hit’. How we follow-up is vital. For the many who ‘struck out’ by not practicing community-enhancing Values, or worse working to undermine them, the ‘next time’ is Now. ‘Now’ to join Voices and Actions for advancing civil justice, equality, and opportunities for all – especially for your children – they are watching.
I was angry, bitter, resentful, confused, and exhausted as I walked the aisles of the Bangkok Gem & Jewelry Show.
My company was providing site and transport security for the precious goods at the bi-annual show.
The Bangkok Gem & Jewelry Show is one of the largest international exhibitions and markets for diamonds, precious gems, and gold and silver jewelry. Tens of thousands of dollars are spent by the jewelry merchants on elaborate booths and display areas to attract the international buyers. Hundreds of millions of dollars of jewelry is on display and for sale.
In the 12 hours preceding my walk down the aisle I had been glued to CNN watching the horror of the attacks and collapse of the World Trade Center buildings.
Disbelief and confusion turned to anger. As a former military man I wanted to don my flight suit, strap-on my bomber, and deliver punishment to those responsible. But who? The perpetrators were not members of any nations’ formal military. America had not been attacked by a nation. This made it difficult to channel my anger. Foolishly I let the anger, resentment, and desire for ‘payback’ build.
PIO (Pilot Induced Oscillation): PIO is a condition where the appropriate aircraft response is compromised due to repeated overcorrections by the pilot. This can result in temporary or total loss of control of the aircraft.
By the time I arrived at the Gem & Jewelry Show I was bitter and judgmental. Walking the aisles between the elaborate and expensive booths my unexpressed thoughts were, “How ridiculous! The ‘real world’ had just changed and all these people are scurrying about hawking bangles that have no utility or relevance to events of the day – the ‘real world’.”
Dutifully I assisted my staff to perform our contracted security services. All the while the resentment of what I perceived to be ‘the ridiculous’ was growing – a developingPIO. My judgments were critical of supporting wasting tons of money and energy in marketing hyper-expensive useless merchandise. I was demanding a meaning and aggressive response.
In mid-morning an important client came to discuss my company’s services. Again dutifully, I put on my ‘game-face’ and accorded him appropriate respect and courtesy. This man was concerned about his business and how he might improve his products and service to his international buyers. My company’s timely and secure transport services were important to his customers.
At some point in our discussion waves of new thinking began to wash over me. Slowly I began to see this gentleman and his colleague gem and jewelry merchants as partners in a process of bringing beauty and joy to others. The hyper-expensive useless jewelry that I formerly claimed to be irrelevant was most often given in celebration of achievement, appreciation, or love. These certainly were not irrelevant ‘end-results’.
Intentionally I coached my judgments and resentments to turn to appreciation. The world does have horror, ugliness, and tragedy. It became clear to me that if I focus on these my ability to see beauty is severely diminished. In this diminished capacity I am less resourceful to take helpful contributing actions or support others who are.
The events of 9/11 in New York were a tragedy by every measure. For me in Bangkok, the personal insights that I realized and nurtured that day, have aided me to stay more resourceful in dealing with personal and organizational crises. When a crisis or tragedy stimulate anger, resentment, or judgment to strike I work to see the ‘biggest picture’ and move toward resourcefulness.
I also work to teach this on the sports’ field and in my business operations. It’s always a challenge – but a worthy one. Do I always get it right? Heck no! But I practice – and practice makes better.
The intention is not to ‘feel better’ but to give opportunities for better results – in my experience it always does both.
Question & Challenge: When in your experience have you been in a PIO or have been derailed by anger, resentment, or judgment?
What was the outcome?
Describe a different outcome had you converted these corrosive feelings to more resourceful ones.
“Never underestimate the impression you may make on others and whose life you have touched today!”
The story below is a special one for me. I first read it 15 years ago when i was going through a life transition. Often I do so again to remind me of my continuous opportunities and challenges.
The Old Phone … How Do You Spell Fix?
Author Unknown
When I was quite young, my father had one of the first telephones in our neighborhood. I remember the polished, old case fastened to the wall. The shiny receiver hung on the side of the box. I was too little to reach the telephone, but used to listen with fascination when my mother talked to it.
Then I discovered that somewhere inside the wonderful device lived an amazing person. Her name was “Information Please” and there was nothing she did not know. Information Please could supply anyone’s number and the correct time.
My personal experience with the genie-in-a-bottle came one day while my mother was visiting a neighbor. Amusing myself at the tool bench in the basement, I whacked my finger with a hammer, the pain was terrible, but there seemed no point in crying because there was no one home to give sympathy.
I walked around the house sucking my throbbing finger, finally arriving at the stairway. The telephone! Quickly, I ran for the footstool in the parlor and dragged it to the landing. Climbing up, I unhooked the receiver in the parlor and held it to my ear. “Information, please” I said into the mouthpiece just above my head. A click or two and a small clear voice spoke into my ear. “Information.”
“I hurt my finger…” I wailed into the phone, the tears came readily enough now that I had an audience.
“Isn’t your mother home?” came the question.
“Nobody’s home but me,” I blubbered.
“Are you bleeding?” the voice asked.
“No,” I replied. “I hit my finger with the hammer and it hurts.”
“Can you open the icebox?” she asked. I said I could.
“Then chip off a little bit of ice and hold it to your finger,” said the voice.
After that, I called “Information Please” for everything. I asked her for help with my geography, and she told me where Philadelphia was. She helped me with my math. She told me my pet chipmunk that I had caught in the park just the day before, would eat fruit and nuts.
Then, there was the time Petey, our pet canary, died. I called, “Information Please,” and told her the sad story. She listened, and then said things grown-ups say to soothe a child. But I was not consoled. I asked her, “Why is it that birds should sing so beautifully and bring joy to all families, only to end up as a heap of feathers on the bottom of a cage?”
She must have sensed my deep concern, for she said quietly, “Paul always remember that there are other worlds to sing in. “Somehow I felt better. Another day I was on the telephone, “Information Please.”
“Information,” said in the now familiar voice. “How do I spell fix?” I asked.
All this took place in a small town in the Pacific Northwest . When I was nine years old, we moved across the country to Boston. I missed my friend very much. “Information Please” belonged in that old wooden box back home and I somehow never thought of trying the shiny new phone that sat on the table in the hall. As I grew into my teens, the memories of those childhood conversations never really left me. Often, in moments of doubt and perplexity I would recall the serene sense of security I had then. I appreciated now how patient, understanding, and kind she was to have spent her time on a little boy.
A few years later, on my way west to college, my plane put down in Seattle. I had about a half-hour or so between planes. I spent 15 minutes or so on the phone with my sister, who lived there now. Then without thinking what I was doing, I dialed my hometown operator and said, “Information Please.” Miraculously, I heard the small, clear voice I knew so well. “Information.” I hadn’t planned this, but I heard myself saying, “Could you please tell me how to spell fix?”
There was a long pause. Then came the soft spoken answer, “I guess your finger must have healed by now.” I laughed, “So it’s really you,” I said. “I wonder if you have any idea how much you meant to me during that time.”
“I wonder,” she said, “if you know how much your call meant to me. I never had any children and I used to look forward to your calls.” I told her how often I had thought of her over the years and I asked if I could call her again when I came back to visit my sister.
“Please do”, she said. “Just ask for Sally.”
Three months later I was back in Seattle. A different voice answered, “Information.” I asked for Sally.
“Are you a friend?” she said.
“Yes, a very old friend,” I answered.
“I’m sorry to have to tell you this,” she said. “Sally had been working part-time the last few years because she was sick. She died five weeks ago.” Before I could hang up she said, “Wait a minute, did you say your name was Paul?” “Yes.” I answered.
“Well, Sally left a message for you. She wrote it down in case you called. Let me read it to you.”
The note said, “Tell him there are other worlds to sing in. He’ll know what I mean.”
I thanked her and hung up. I knew what Sally meant.
Never underestimate the impression you may make on others and whose life you have touched today!
“Vision without Action is a daydream. Acton without Vision is a nightmare.”
– Japanese Proverb
“Leadership is a “can-do”, “get-it-done”, “everyone-pull-together”, “whatever-it- takes” attitude.”
– Orville Schell
Giving homage to the thousands of books on management techniques, I still claim that Leadership and Management are more art than science, although techniques can be learned. Effective techniques must accommodate culture and environment. Measuring and monitoring what is actually occurring with management interventions must be ongoing. Timely decisiveness is crucial to effective management and leadership. We must learn to take advantage of current fortune and be alert not to relax or underinvest in developing future options.
Always have a back-up plan. Always have an exit strategy. Always have an alternative airfield.
Always start your Plan with 4W + H:
– What? – Who? – Where? – Why? – How?
Colin Powell advised that the probability of success for any endeavor requires obtaining 40 to 70 percent of the essential information and then “go with your gut”.
A good friend, who is a very senior executive of Chevron, advises the following,
“Good leaders are well grounded, introspective and humble. They never let power or ego blind them. Good leaders have passion and a bias for action. Leaders are not afraid to make mistakes but they are determined to learn from them. Responsible leaders don’t accept the status quo and always work to change the outcome. These leaders see the innate potential in people and unlock it. Through inspiration and role-modeling, these leaders win the hearts and minds of everyone around them and get more from their people than humanly possible.“
Management and Leadership must co-exist. Good observation skills coupled with people-skills are essential for effective Management / Leadership.
Successful Leadership / Management strategies and processes must emanate from the synergistic intersection where courage, action, and responsibility meet.
Six P’s of Effective Leadership / Management
Proper Prior Planning Prevents Poor Performance.
My Operating Definition of Leadership:
Lead – to be out-in-front Ship – a transport system
Therefore, for me, Leadership is a process that moves you forward, puts you out-in-front, that is synonymous with influence, authority, power, and the ability to get things done. This process is vital for personal and organizational effectiveness.
Responsible leadership is taking charge, even if only of oneself, to move toward a better place.
While researching principles for Leadership several concepts became apparent:
The wisdom and advice for improved life experience through personal resolve apply to effective Responsible Leadership
The corollary is also true: the principles for Responsible Leadership apply to strengthening personal resolve and enhancing an individual’s life experience.
The principles of Responsible Leadership, the attributes, and the contributions are goals and actions that anyone can use in any situation.
Leadership is a privilege. An appreciative public showers effective responsible leaders with acknowledgment and social and financial benefits.
My selection of Small Bites represents my primary life-bias. My comments in introducing Small Bites were not originally intended to editorialize as the categories and selections speak for themselves. The chapter headings are themselves a recommended pathway. Yet, I concur with recent criticisms about the loss of focus on the important things driving social and personal progress.
Since the 1980’s, in my opinion, too many of our brightest young people, those most likely harboring the promise of greatest social contributions, have chosen not to work in the fields related to STEMM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Math, and Medicine). Many instead have opted to work in the Wall Street linked industries where, in my opinion, relatively less lasting social value is created or contributed. Many suggest that this imbalance of talent and power in the financial industries have exacerbated the dangers of debt-fueled economic growth and spirally debt crises with the social ills of growing inequality and money influence on politics.
Some of the major societal growth drivers, which need our near-term attention and improvement are: public education, physical health and fitness, renewable energy grids, land-based and digital infrastructures and accessibility. While the Liberal Arts can contribute great value in lifting the human spirit, the STEMM competencies are in short supply and are needed to address many of the major issues impacting our societies.
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